Aspergers Quiz

I found this hanging around some street corner of the InterWeb.

Took it myself and got:

Your Aspie score: 29 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 180 of 200
You are very likely neurotypical

What I did on my Summer vacation.

Our yearly vacation consists of visiting my in-laws up in Canada. We usually have a mix of activities that include going to the beach, shopping, dining and visiting touristy places.

Connor looks forward to this trip, partially out of consistency. He has been ready to go a few months now and when the day arrived he was anxious for us to get in the van and get going. We had a few issues that prevented us from having a defined time to leave. This further played havoc with Connors sense of the universe. As with any Autistic, he has angst when things change.

When we did hit the road things went well. We stopped at the hotel in Kelso he preferred and went swimming. T and D went to the movies. We had waffles in the morning and made the rest of the journey. Connor was next interested in the water park (H2O centre), going to the beach and eating French fries at Jax. Sadly Jax had closed.

My running in the AM was a nice way to start the day. There is a number of foothills that made for a challenging run. I added a bit more to the beginning of my run and was soon just over 4-1/2 miles a day. I also got to run up mission hill. Something I had been wanting to do for quite some time. The plan was to make it a six mile run ending with the uphill portion. Sadly I forgot that odometers are in Kilometers and so I ran 3 miles (6k).

Around my mom-in-laws home there were some tasks that needed doing. I was able to hang up some plants extending the chains, replaced a handle on the sliding doors, re-ran the string to close the upstairs bedroom curtains and replaced the flapper on the up stairs bathroom toilet.

We got to see my nephew's martial arts classes and enjoy life in BC for awhile.

The concept of moving up there reared its head on a couple of occasions. There is a lot to like about the people and the area.

Luncheon Ladies

The lunch ladies are enamored of Connor. Monday, I had to drop off a check for meals at school. Connor gets breakfast there. The, rather dour, lunch lady seemed a bit annoyed at having to stop her conversation to deal with the issue (myself) who had appeared.

Until, I mentioned I was Connors father. Then the sun started shining and summer came full bloom and all was wonderful in the world! Assurance of how delightful it he was, along with the strengths of his personality. "French toast sticks, NO sausage!"

They like the fact he is "up" and happy. He does enjoy his breakfasts..

Connors World

(As stated before in my notes, Connor is my 12 year old son who has Autism.)

We have been informed of our travel plans this summer. The declaration was put forth by our 12 year old, stated in no-nonsense terms. This is what will happen...

School ends June 10th. Then we pack the suitcase, and drive to hotel called Holiday inn. We put on swim suits and swim in the pool, go to sleep. Then have waffles and drive north to Canada.

Pretty straightforward right? It does actually fit pretty well with what we are going to do, with good reason. Connor likes for things to be static, ritualistic if you will. He does not handle change. Everyone has different ways of dealing with ambiguity, some better then others. Connor has been able to see and be comforted by finding the static within the change.

He is adaptive in his reasoning. If we go to a Quality Inn, instead of Holiday Inn, he will accept the difference, because he can see that it is still a hotel. Now if the hotel does not have a pool or the waffle maker breakfast. Things are going to begin to get dicey. Yes, we can work him through the situation and he will emerge from the other side. The thing is this, we will probably have to help him through other things, so why not accommodate what we can, as it provides him a degree of comfort and control.

Communication is something most people overlook when it comes to kids. Imagine someone obviously hurting and crying. This person is not able to relate the problem. It could be physical, it could be mental, it could be emotional. As a parent it is paramount to help and without the knowing what is wrong, the knowing how to help, is nigh impossible. It can be heart wrenching. It is...

When Connor can relate to us something like vacation plans. We engage the communication fully. We will make corrections to his expectations. We have also, purposefully, altered plans in order to teach him he can deal with ambiguity. So when unforeseen events occur he has those skills.

No one is crazy about change. The more draconian the more we push back. It is our nature. Yet, our environment is one of near constant change. I suppose the human condition is one of conflict.

Autism and World of Warcraft

Autism and World of Warcraft. Meet Merve he is Eight years old and has Aspergers. This is of great interest. Both of my boys having Autism, Trevor on the Aspergers side of the scale.

W0W.com ran a feature on him which explains much better then I would in writing.

As parents we let our children play MMORPG's back when we were running around Asherons Call. Our kids would watch and hear the tales, naturally they wanted to give it a try. Both of them learned how to touch type and got to have their own adventures. We monitored them quite carefully and used every opportunity to teach them safe interaction skills.

"So where are do you live?" was answered with "Hebian-To in Dereth of course"

"How old are you?" was "level 26 now, should be 27 in a little bit"

Eventually we moved on to a superhero genre game City of Heroes. Connor was old enough to want to play. So we would let him explore the virtual city. Sometimes with surprising results. Once we found him leading a super team in a 'dangerous' warehouse raid, despite them warning him to "slow down" and asking "what are you doing?" he was surprisingly successful.

The group had a laugh to find a five year old Autistic boy was their erstwhile leader. Now it is a standing reward system for our boys, depending upon work done or activity earned. Connor still loves exploring and his ability to get a weaker character to the middle of a very dangerous zone baffles the mind.

The linked blog and write up is a great example of how autism can work.

Connor's Early Morning.

I guess this is not all that amusing. Until you take into account Connors Autism. When he responds to a situation it can take you off guard.

He again lost a tooth handed it to mom with strict instructions to throw it away, because that "tooth is trouble". This kid does NOT want some fairy with money visiting him! No-siree bob!

I have the duty of rousting him from a nights sleep. This generally occurs around 7:15 AM Pacific Time (GMT -08:00). The response given will run the gambit from nothing to a near leaping from his upper bunk!

This morning was an example of the former. "Good Morning Connor! It is Wednesday and Time to get ready for school!" Instead of the disheveled squinting, labored mobilization to a sitting position, instead a verbal response was issued.

"Dangit!"

Which gave me a chuckle, in all empathy!"

Bike riding

The only way to get better at an activity is to do said activity. Profound eh?

I read someplace that putting in 10,000 hours makes you an expert. While I am not really sure about expert, assuming the quality of the time you would certainly be much better. There may be oblique proof in my roller skating. I certainly put in the hours. I can certainly skate well now.

So with my statistical sampling of one goes, it is factual!

Connor has made great strides in riding his bike. He still has lots of control issues. Things like riding straight, starting from a stop, needs more time. His confidence has nearly outpaced his ability.

While camping he found great joy in heading down the boat ramp and seeing how close to the water he could stop. Mom got palpitations watching that one. He has enthusiasm galore and the ability to crash, recover and get back on the bike. I mean bad bruise raising incidents. Nary a tear as well. Just him grimacing and saying ow until the pain subsides and getting back on board.

It is oddly inspiring and a source of pride seeing this. His mind really is remarkable, as he is a remarkable kid.

Today we were going to go the the park and ride to Wendy's. The rain started and I decided going up the street for a root beer would allow us to get to cover easier then the park. We headed down our road (pretty good incline downwards). Connor was very happy with his using the break to not careen out of control into traffic (I was trepidation personified). At the bottom he followed my verbal instructions to the letter, going on the sidewalk and pulling to the right for pedestrians.

Whom Connor talked to with a friendly "Good Afternoon!" The bridge near our house has a very narrow sidewalk. Connor was not able to pedal across. So we walk\rode it across to were there is no sidewalk. I pointed out how he is to ride on the dirt and he complied. We visited the market and got some soda's. Rode to his old elementary school (via a foot bridge). Drank our beverages and headed out into the nature trails.

Connor had a route already planned, allowing him to see various features, which we dutifully stopped and explored. As Oregon weather complied by not dumping rain on us, it was a fun outing. I figure he has 99,990 hours to go...

And you go camping.

Connor got really excited about spring break. He wants to go camping.

So we booked a Yurt at a nearby campground. Not very expensive and close enough to home in case his idea of camping and the reality of camping collide. Not that I think that will happen. We have had situations in the past where a good exit plan is required.

Autism builds rituals which can become tradition in short order. When we celebrate advent, we have the candles and readings followed by holiday songs. Connor has assigned us which song we are to sing. The elder two are not happy about the song choices thrust upon them. However, when pressed for an alternative, they cannot think of any. So they acquiesce to the request.

Last week he started making our summer vacation plans. We have a tentative Canada trip planned to see Omi, Aunt Connie and the cousins. Along with other sorted outings. Although, in Connors mind an important part is making sure we drive North and stop at a motel with a swimming pool.

Awareness, Correct, Correctness

Connor likes people. Lets qualify that, he likes when people direct a certain amount of attention towards him.

While learning to ride his bike Connor would stop passers by with a friendly "Excuse me!" Folks out for a walk in the park tend to be a forgiving bunch, when it comes to kids. Or so I found out.

Connor would then go on to say something like "Look, I can pedal!" followed by "Okay, gotta go!"

The people would chuckle, I would explain he just learned how to ride. Then we would head off down the path. After about the fifth group, I decided this ritual pattern is not in the best interest of Connor, bike riding, park walkers and myself. So I cautioned him to just ride and say "good afternoon" This worked much better then the staccato start and stopping.

His cheery good afternoon was met with many happy returns, except for the grunting of the teens who appeared to resent walking and daylight and the world in general...

So here is the conundrum. Connor needs to learn to engage in back and forth conversation to relate idea's, concepts and information. So if he is in distress we can ask him "What happened" and have him respond "I fell and banged my head."

There is nothing malicious about Connor. We prompt him and praise him for his observations. What to do when his correct observations lack 'correctness'.

During our second ride as we approached a couple, Connor noted the woman and informed her that she had a baby in her stomach and she was a "big fat lady". I corrected him (we have been attempting to rid the phrase 'big fat'), I apologized and explained his condition. She was gracious enough but damage done.

So Connor was partially correct in his observation, but not in a way that is polite. Honesty and truth is good. Moderation and restraint does need appropriate application.

Now to teach that....

Pedal driven, human powered, single track vehicle.

Bicycle, I got to teach Connor how to ride one. That makes me three for three (woot!). Connors tutorial was very academic for me, due mostly to his autism by way of my earlier lessons with the older two.

We had two sessions. The first one, I'll call 'inner ear training', was learning that he can balance and pedal, turn and stop. Knowing how to set up the pedal to take advantage of that downward stomp, pushing power, is paramount. I find that working with Newtonian law is pretty difficult when starting out. We also had him 'walk' the bike while seated then glide to get the feel for balancing. After 10 minutes or so he was done and so we headed back home.

The next day I opted to bike ride to Burger King. This is a familiar route, we have taken many times, on the swing bike (kind of attachable tandem). Connor was quick to understand this familiar theme. Although he did keep asking if I was taking my grey bike.

When we arrived at the park (which is quite nice and quite large) I went over a few of the same lessons and we set off. Me jogging\walking and providing physical and emotional support. His ability had already jumped up from the previous day. I figure his muscle memory recall had taken over. We had several stops and starts with various degree's crashing, as expected. None were too bad. I was waiting for the inevitable big crash.

I noted he began to lean against me to ease the process. My response was to change sides. This was actually a good sign that he learned how to shift his balance. Around the five minute mark into the trip he put it all together and started riding. We covered some 100' to 200' long sections before going off trail. Around the third or fourth of these 'excursion' to the immediate right of the paved path, Connor was able to correct course and get back on trial by himself. He had that wobbly over-steering going on that is both amusing and dangerous to someone running alongside. I got to test my dodge a few times. While turning is something that we need to gain confidence on. The pedaling and general riding teaching was mastered. He did stop everyone on the trail to call attention to his being able to ride. People seemed amused and a bit later down the trail as we met two ladies a second time. The requested to watch his newfound prowess and heaped accolades. All good things.

We did have the bad crash. A sign pole over by our Wal-mart built wetlands (reclaimed). Like most poles to new riders it appeared to exert a some kind of attraction force and yanked him directly towards it, faster then I could respond, He let go with one hand and that was all she wrote. He went down pretty hard on his left knee. He had a bit of crying, which means quite a lot of pain was involved, Connor is not given to histrionics. He did not break skin and he was able to walk around without favoring or new pain.

Then the most important part. He got on the bike and continued. While I am not sure why this happens the way it does, it always happens. It strikes me as infinitely valuable in life, after crashes, you get back on the bike.

By the time we made it to Burger King Connor was riding very well. We took the road through the VA (also in the park) on the way back and I spent the bulk of the journey running.

It was a very good day.

Schools = social experiment with no outcome requirement.

Assume you are married and have a child who has a driving license a car which they support. Further, said child has an issue with driving too fast. As a parent you want to make sure they are safe and obeying the law.

What are the degree of options?

Do not allow them to drive is at one end with Do nothing at the other. I propose that most parents will do something within those parameters. I can think of a handful of discussion and demonstrations that would be pretty persuasive. In other words I would be inclined to have a sliding scale starting with discussion and education, which falls closer to the Do Nothing end.

The above analogy is a pretty typical problem solving exercise. Analogy? Oh, did I forget to mention this is about Childhood Obesity?

Obesity does have a number of health risk factors. It is a problem. So how to solve that problem?

Same degrees of options apply Do nothing to incarcerate the individual until they show proper health habits...

Seeing as how we do have mandatory schooling in this country and, to me, this is an educational issue. How about evaluating each kids health and informing the parents?

Or Having a class on exercise and health benefits, with Instruction, Hands on and Reading components makes a certain degree of sense.

If you wanted the same thing but done private sector you could push that burden to insurance companies with something like lower rates if your fit, or some insane idea like that.

Federally you could impose a Fat Tax on anyone obese. (okay, getting to much on the sillier end of things).

Of course you do need to factor in that being Fat does not pose health risks to everyone. (Here is the layman term press release of same). There are "thin" people with the same health issues as fatter ones. So why target the fat? Why not target the unhealthy? or why target anyone? Why not target everyone?

At Connors school the decided to eliminate the icing from the cinnamon rolls (because 48 less calories will solve obesity in children?). They also made the soda machines carry non-sugar\low sugar beverages. Anyone who has met Connor can see he is not in the fat category. If you spend a day with him, you know he falls into the fit category as well. Further he has a very tough time with Change. So I get a phone call from a lunch lady (who apparently loves Connor's demeanor) asking permission to add icing to his cinnamon roll. Curiously, I was not consulted to remove said icing.

As for the soda machines, what was the outcome? Jr. High students left campus to the corner store and bought a 64 ounce soda, instead of the 12 ounce they were drinking. So kids drank MORE SUGAR!

Connors Birthday Party at School.

Keep in mind that at 12 years of age certain social attitudes can prevail. Unless your Connor.

We got the following e-mail from his teacher:

Hello! We just had a little party for Connor. He wanted to dance for his party so we did! We had the party from 9:25 to 10:05 so that our PE and literacy helpers/peers could be here also! They all had a blast! I think it went well. Michael, our literacy peer, taught us how to do the moonwalk, the worm, and breakdancing! Connor loved the "spinning" that I did with him. I was taking his hands and sort of showing him how to swing dance and he turned in into a spin! It was fun but boy was I dizzy!

Connor never brought up dancing for his birthday at home. However, for the last week, in anticipation of his birthday, he has broached the subject at school with regularity. Most classes have parties in the afternoon. Connor, no doubt, pushed this agenda and God Bless his teacher for understanding and getting the helpers/peers involved.

Helpers/Peers are your typical everyday Jr. High students who have a period where they assist the special needs room. The fact that they enjoyed and participated above and beyond really speaks to the infectious nature Connor wields. (Just come to a family function where we pray before meals and Connor has us do a wave, to which my family lovingly complies)

Muppets Punk M.O.

Thanks to S.V. for point this out to me. LOL funny!

Blip-Vertisments.

Advertising revenue allows radio and television stations to stay in business. There are quite a few people employed, directly and obliquely because of marketing. There are many different good and bad things associated with the advertising industry.

To my way of thinking advertising is more informational. Hey, this product exists! It may or may not work the way we are showing you. Let the buyer beware. I cannot recall a product I personally purchased as a result of a commercial. Yet, there are quite a few things I have purchased after watching some show on the Food Network. Alton Brown can have that influence.

Connor, being how he is, tends to latch onto products based purely upon the marketing. The products that peek this interest are few and far between. Usually, they are a one shot deal. For the greater part, he just enjoys the humor in the commercials, which lean towards slap stick.

As a consumer savvy society we take a jaundiced view at people who are "selling something." Most of us easily see the fact from fiction.

Enter this commercial

Connor wanted to purchase the above product. Finally it arrived in the stores we frequent. This became rather interesting. There was a concern on his part that his head would blow up. While this was a minor concern, requiring a modicum of re-assurance. I made the tactical error of thinking he was joking and confirmed the possibility. Bad form on my part.

Tina, being the smarter of us two, was able to re-assure. He tried the candy and I am thinking that is pretty much it for the experience. Her careful stating that it was only a commercial was a much more parental approach.

This got me wondering about any outlandish commercials that I believed and sure enough one from my youth was remembered. It had a mom type actress who put some peanuts into a shaker and after a few shakes, it had turned to peanut butter. As we had a shaker and some peanuts around the house, I was promptly disillusioned by conducting the experiment myself.

All in all a parenting 101 lesson for me.

Freedom Demolition

At one point in time I was talking to a friend about firearm purchases. His contention was anyone who owned a firearm was a danger to society. Recently I was reading about certain TV sets being banned in California. The phrase "Why would anyone buy something like that?" popped into my mind. That question, in one context, is perfectly reasonable. In another context, one dealing with banning or regulation, is the elimination of freedoms.

Are there certain things a person should not be able to buy? Sure, weapons grade plutonium, for instance. The line that gets drawn is a slippery slope fraught with peril.

One of the channels on the TV played Demolition man, and it had a bit more social commentary then I had given credit. Given the current administrations perchance for regulation and neologisms.

Napolitano preferred the euphemism Man-Made disaster in place of Terrorist Attack. Iin the film: homicide is referred to as a "non-sanctioned life termination" and as "Murder Death Kill" or "MDK". The loosening of decency standards depicted is more of a conservative bent then liberal. A violation of the Verbal Morality Statute, is punishable by police reprimand or a fine. In liberal fashion though, the fine is automatically deducted from a citizen's finances.

Then the government control of media in that the favorite songs of the time are old 20th-century commercial jingles (kid oriented ones) and many words have gained redundant, childish repetitions: to be happy is to experience "joy-joy" feelings. Which bodes of the nanny state.

Then comes the crux. It is explained that anything "not good for you" is deemed "bad" and therefore illegal, including alcohol, caffeine, contact sports, non-educational toys, meat, spicy and unhealthy food, table salt and tobacco (sound familier?). Firearms can only be seen in museums (Gun Control!). Physical contact was recognized as causing the spread of disease and is now seen as unusual (This is enforced in Elementary school). Even high-fives have been replaced with energetic waving. Procreation is carried out in a laboratory (Heavily regulated no doubt); abortion is illegal, but so is unlicensed pregnancy. I can see Nancy Pelosi salivating at the prospect!

I ponder why it is those elected to 'represent us' sometimes feel the need to "protect us from ourselves?"

Feast of St. Nicklaus (Connor style)

Tina and I have adopted many of Tina's German traditions for Christmas. One of the funnest is putting your boots out on the night of Dec 5th, and getting goodies the next morning. Somehow the few years I have put a boot out, I got nothing. I guess St. Nick was afeared of the goodies acquirement of certain smells?

So amidst thecooking and baking of this particular Saturday, after Connor's Saturday night bath, with his preparing for bed, he brought his boot out. There was a bit of confusion on his part, but he has done this in the past. So when the remembrance hit he suddenly decided to write a note.

"Get the paper and pencil!" he was quite excited and insistant. Curious as to were this was heading I gathered the requested items and handed it over.

Connor began to write in ernest; "Dear Santa Claus. Would you put the candy on the boot. Connor"

Next, I was instructed to get a bottle and a rubber band. The note was then rolled up and put in the bottle with the rubber band holding it in a small scroll. Then Connor put the message bottle outside prominently on the plant stand, this will obviously attract the attention of St. Nick, whom now properly instructed, can leave the goodies in the correct location. Thereby relieving any confusion. This particular method of message delivery is a new twist on an old Police song. Or possibly a Sponge Bob episode (thank goodness he did not insist on firing it from a Cannon)

Oh, Nick left a note thanking Connor.

The next morning Ma in her kerchief and I in my cap were rustled out of bed to the delighted squeals. Prior to looking in the boots, we did have to pause and look out the window, this is very important. Please, do NOT forget to look out the window with your kids today...

Chasing Corporations Out Of The U.S.

This was a disturbing read for me.

"But it is not just taxation that is chasing corporations out of America. Another top consideration is access to talent. The U.S. now spends more per capita on public education than any other OECD country, but its students test in the bottom decile."

"A culture that turns a blind eye to government failure, but is quick and unrelenting to blame society's ills on business, will naturally and subliminally embrace socialist solutions. The problem is that when one intervention fails, the government attempts to fix its errors with yet more intervention"

As taxes become more punitive for the rich, those who can will relocate to a more hospitable local. A liberal blogger I know, when confronted with this stated that "The rich will not leave the US, they never had it so good."

This is not the world of the 1950's and 1960's. Well educated workforce's are luring businesses to their locations in a siren song of business friendly government. Our administration seems content with pressing forward with the idea that business needs to earn less and pay more to the government and workforce.

Everything has a price. Every choice has repercussions.

In a large group meeting, at a previous employer of mine. One of management was asking the crowd "What is it you want?" in my typical clownish style shouted anonymously "More Pay for less work." Which got a laugh and the management response of "Me too!"

Talk about human nature in action. If you took a paper and pencil out right now and started a list of things that you should be doing around your home. I am pretty sure that list would grow a life of its own as each item conjured up another. If you were to do the same exercise three months later, I bet you will list many of the same things.

As a thought experiment, what if you were to assign some compensation to the top five items on the list, a reward, if you will...

Human nature.

Harness the laughter, find the source!

It is a given that Connor is going to share something he finds funny. His days are a good 90% smiles. An infectious smile at that, with a twinkling of the eyes that you know his cleverness.

His humor is such that he will find something amusing and crack himself up. Peals of laughter is the term I would use. Now, figuring out why something is funny is another matter.

With kids in general you can become perplexed at what they view as the end all be all in humor. With Connor his enthusiastic enjoyment makes that perplexing shared item funny regardless of the what.

Case in point: "I'm the Captain, I love pools, pools, pools, pools." This is sung in a short sing-song manager, followed by laughter, then repeated a few times.

Along with head scratching bewilderment, Tina and I find ourselves rattling off this little ditty. This has been going on for several months. Most times our older two discover the origins. This time no such luck. It stayed beyond our scope of understanding. In truth this is not something doggedly persued, it is just a passing "WT* is that?" sort of thing.

"I'm the Captain, I love pools, pools, pools, pools."

So there was a conjunction of sorts, earlier in the week. I had the curiosity about the ditty at the same time Connor was skimming You Tube.

"Connor, show me I'm the Captain, I love pools, please?" He did his happy squeal and started typing in Google search, 'Water of Doom' this brought up a 32 second film clip.

I must caution you that this clip is not all that. I recommend you can stop it after 10 seconds to get the part that Connor likes. Oh the sound on it is REALLY LOUD!

Connors singing of "I'm the Captain, I love pools, pools, pools, pools." is much superior...

As is tradition in the Autistic mind (pictures)

Trevor making the "Angry face." Note the Dremel pumpkin tool we got at Lowes.

This is my assigned "Smile" pumpkin, I went for a Mater look...

This one is Connor's design. Not sure if he assigned himself anything. He likes the results.

Mom got to do the "Love" face. Which came out the best.

As is tradition in the autistic mind.

Today is a very special day. It is the day Connor goes to the pumpkin patch to pick up a pumpkin.

This has been a local outing since Kindergarten. More then that, it is a a ritual tradition that Autumn means "Go to Pumpkin patch." Early last month he ambled into our room and proclaimed that he would be going, never quite sure if he was told he was going to go or he decided he was going to go we dutifully set up a timeline. Which was then etched into the stone of his life.

When we got a note saying he needed to dress for muddy conditions, it seems as a near sure thing. If not, we will make a family journey to get pumpkins. We have to get four Pumpkins and will be assigned on what emotion\design we are to create. After all Connor is a benevolent task master. I can only attempt to explain how much fun he is when thus motivated. He gets so much enjoyment out of these little traditions. I feel it helps him make sense of things, gives him that consistency of life that keeps him even keeled.

As a family we had all but eliminated the pumpkin carving portion of things. On our hill, we do not get many trick-or-treaters. Our towns tradition is to have a huge kids parade downtown which all the shops have treats for the kids. There are some neighborhoods that are well traversed, just not ours.

He was going to get four pumpkins and put them in his backpack. We told him to get one and we would get three more. Maybe a few more, so we can make some pie.

Autumn is awesome. Connor sees to that...