My humor is usually more observational. Every so often I come up with an actual joke. So here it is.
Do you want to know the five magic words that will make nearly any woman take her clothes off?
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"Wow, your gonna wear that?"
December 29, 2006
December 28, 2006
Casual thought
French spaceship begins search for new planets. http://www.hindustantimes.com/news/181_1882048,00040005.htm
I'm reading this article and I cannot help but thinking I would rather have the Portuguese do the exploration...
I'm reading this article and I cannot help but thinking I would rather have the Portuguese do the exploration...
Gerald Ford
President Ford passed away. He was an interesting guy. No one voted for him for the station he ascended too. He stepped into a roll at a time when someone like him was needed.
He was able to put a particularly nasty time behind us and move forward. A good man, a man of destiny if you will.
RIP Mr. President.
He was able to put a particularly nasty time behind us and move forward. A good man, a man of destiny if you will.
RIP Mr. President.
December 27, 2006
Fone whoas
Back in the dark ages, my town only had dial up access to the internet. Need to get phone calls made us get two phone lines (this was back in 1998).
We now have DSL and are happily cugging along like everyone else with an extensive home wireless network with multiple systems accessing the net and through the wonders of bandwith sharing, we can call on the phone at the same time!!!
Until last Wednesday a string of events lead to an even MORE interesting TURN of events.
I tried calling home and got a busy signal. We do not have caller annoy by saying hang on and trying in vein to access a second line (aka caller ID). Or any of those anti-social phone company extra's. So a busy signal is not uncommon. The next break being busy was moreso concerning. As my e-mail home proved that no one was online.
So when I got home I went through the typical trouble shooting. Unplugging the phones to see where the culprit was. When that didnt yeild anything I went down to the basement and started checking the various connections only to get a bag of mixed reactions.
This prompted me to put in a trouble ticket with the phone company. They came out and they went through and found I had not disconnected the TiVO. Dial tone came back and we were good to go.
Until....
The DSL and phone went out on Friday 12-22. I put in another trouble ticket and the guy came out and verified I had dial tone to the house. That means he can charge me to do phone line stuff. So be it. He replaced some stuff and re-wired some stuff and we had dial tone but no DSL. He was unable to determine why the DSL wasnt there as he was a 'phone guy' and did not have DSL stuff.
So I go to call up my phone service and put in a DSL fix request. Here it gets interesting. One of the inhuman (non-human) voice maze thingys asks if you are calling in to report the phone number you are calling in on....
thats confusing.... Lets do an EXAMPLE!
inhuman bodyless voice of doom-> I'm sorry your haveing troubles would you like to start a trouble ticket?
Hapless Human - > Yes, you souless machine!
inhuman bodyless voice of doom-> I did not understand your last response please say it again.
Hapless Human - > Yes. . .
inhuman bodyless voice of doom-> I see, okay will this trouble ticket be about (pause) 4..4..0..6..8..8..8..0..0..0..0.. or a different phone number?
Hapless Human - > um... a different phone... er.. wait...... (hangs up)
So you see the phone number the souless machine rattled off was SUPPOSED to be the phone number I was calling in from. It was my OLD dial in number.
My mind quickly figured out what happened, once upon a time there were several males living in a house across the street from an unammed institution of higher learning *cough* cal-tech *cough*. They had found a live phone line and would connect it and make long distance phone calls that would not be billed to anyone... (alleged, cant prove anything).
So my OLD dial up internet line had been lurking live under the house the ACTUAL problem with my phone line was up at the box.
If I put in a DSL call they would come out on January 2nd because DSL is a non-vital service (I do not understand that either)
So I opted to call back to the phone company and sure enough they got the guy back out to my house in about an hour and after a red faced explination they re attached the correct lines and said they wouldnt charge me for the line work they did.
So it ended well...
We now have DSL and are happily cugging along like everyone else with an extensive home wireless network with multiple systems accessing the net and through the wonders of bandwith sharing, we can call on the phone at the same time!!!
Until last Wednesday a string of events lead to an even MORE interesting TURN of events.
I tried calling home and got a busy signal. We do not have caller annoy by saying hang on and trying in vein to access a second line (aka caller ID). Or any of those anti-social phone company extra's. So a busy signal is not uncommon. The next break being busy was moreso concerning. As my e-mail home proved that no one was online.
So when I got home I went through the typical trouble shooting. Unplugging the phones to see where the culprit was. When that didnt yeild anything I went down to the basement and started checking the various connections only to get a bag of mixed reactions.
This prompted me to put in a trouble ticket with the phone company. They came out and they went through and found I had not disconnected the TiVO. Dial tone came back and we were good to go.
Until....
The DSL and phone went out on Friday 12-22. I put in another trouble ticket and the guy came out and verified I had dial tone to the house. That means he can charge me to do phone line stuff. So be it. He replaced some stuff and re-wired some stuff and we had dial tone but no DSL. He was unable to determine why the DSL wasnt there as he was a 'phone guy' and did not have DSL stuff.
So I go to call up my phone service and put in a DSL fix request. Here it gets interesting. One of the inhuman (non-human) voice maze thingys asks if you are calling in to report the phone number you are calling in on....
thats confusing.... Lets do an EXAMPLE!
inhuman bodyless voice of doom-> I'm sorry your haveing troubles would you like to start a trouble ticket?
Hapless Human - > Yes, you souless machine!
inhuman bodyless voice of doom-> I did not understand your last response please say it again.
Hapless Human - > Yes. . .
inhuman bodyless voice of doom-> I see, okay will this trouble ticket be about (pause) 4..4..0..6..8..8..8..0..0..0..0.. or a different phone number?
Hapless Human - > um... a different phone... er.. wait...... (hangs up)
So you see the phone number the souless machine rattled off was SUPPOSED to be the phone number I was calling in from. It was my OLD dial in number.
My mind quickly figured out what happened, once upon a time there were several males living in a house across the street from an unammed institution of higher learning *cough* cal-tech *cough*. They had found a live phone line and would connect it and make long distance phone calls that would not be billed to anyone... (alleged, cant prove anything).
So my OLD dial up internet line had been lurking live under the house the ACTUAL problem with my phone line was up at the box.
If I put in a DSL call they would come out on January 2nd because DSL is a non-vital service (I do not understand that either)
So I opted to call back to the phone company and sure enough they got the guy back out to my house in about an hour and after a red faced explination they re attached the correct lines and said they wouldnt charge me for the line work they did.
So it ended well...
December 23, 2006
December 21, 2006
Merry Merry...
So, I get into work today to find out that payroll made an error and are going to deduct the 200.00 sumptin dollars they overpaid me.
tis the season eh?
tis the season eh?
December 19, 2006
Insane customer day...again...
Actual Transcript of a voice mail message:
I am getting sick of this. I have left two messages and I need someone to call me back NOW! This is just poor customer service. Call me back NOW!
Third message same voice. no name no reference of any kind.
I am getting sick of this. I have left two messages and I need someone to call me back NOW! This is just poor customer service. Call me back NOW!
Third message same voice. no name no reference of any kind.
December 12, 2006
December 10, 2006
December 08, 2006
“very credible”
This is just too good to not share:
Okay go to this website and read a bit: http://zapatopi.net/treeoctopus/
..good..
Okay now go read this artical:
http://www.advance.uconn.edu/2006/061113/06111308.htm
Now either Laugh or bang your head against something. Your choice...
Okay go to this website and read a bit: http://zapatopi.net/treeoctopus/
..good..
Okay now go read this artical:
http://www.advance.uconn.edu/2006/061113/06111308.htm
Now either Laugh or bang your head against something. Your choice...
December 07, 2006
Nothing says love like online gaming
It was obliquely pointed out to me how cool it was that my wife enjoys computer games. At home we have two facing computer desks and regularly log-in as a duet. Most online games, MMORPG's escpecially, teaming up makes the missions go quicker easier and thus more fun.
The total being greater then the sum of the parts. This harkened me back to the time she first participated.
It was a sunday afternoon and I had logged into a game called Asherons Call (AC). This was a sword and sorcery setting game that had a pretty nasty penalty if your character died. You would be weakened (vitae) and your 'corpse' would hang onto a couple of your most expensive items. If you could make it back to your 'corpse' you could open it and take your items back. So getting back was paramount because some of the items were hard won.
Anyways, my perchance for exploration lead me to this volcanic dungeon. It was oddly empty and I was able to make it down to the depths before I found anything to battle. I lost and headed back. As I hit the room where I had 'died' I was jumped by several baddies and dropped more items. This particular labrinth had been cleaned out just before I had entered and now all the critters had respawned. I was now five deaths in and the bulk of my hard won gear was looking nigh impossible to retreive.
So, I sent out a message to some of my guild mates. Word got around that I needed a rescue and most of my guild enjoyed the challenge. While the forces where gathering the clock started working against me.
I had to go to a previous appointment that obviously took precident over any game. However with the people online gathering and my character so weakened I was actually torn about what to do.
Enter my wife. She agreed to help by running my character. I showed her the basics of the game and she explained to the guild her substituting. (no guild talking was around then).
To this day I am not exactly sure what all went on but over the next couple of hours Tina was able to recover all my gear and charm the bulk of the people in my guild who, in turn, kept insisting that she should 'roll' up a character.
And so she did. That evolved into a second account and later dual computers.
The total being greater then the sum of the parts. This harkened me back to the time she first participated.
It was a sunday afternoon and I had logged into a game called Asherons Call (AC). This was a sword and sorcery setting game that had a pretty nasty penalty if your character died. You would be weakened (vitae) and your 'corpse' would hang onto a couple of your most expensive items. If you could make it back to your 'corpse' you could open it and take your items back. So getting back was paramount because some of the items were hard won.
Anyways, my perchance for exploration lead me to this volcanic dungeon. It was oddly empty and I was able to make it down to the depths before I found anything to battle. I lost and headed back. As I hit the room where I had 'died' I was jumped by several baddies and dropped more items. This particular labrinth had been cleaned out just before I had entered and now all the critters had respawned. I was now five deaths in and the bulk of my hard won gear was looking nigh impossible to retreive.
So, I sent out a message to some of my guild mates. Word got around that I needed a rescue and most of my guild enjoyed the challenge. While the forces where gathering the clock started working against me.
I had to go to a previous appointment that obviously took precident over any game. However with the people online gathering and my character so weakened I was actually torn about what to do.
Enter my wife. She agreed to help by running my character. I showed her the basics of the game and she explained to the guild her substituting. (no guild talking was around then).
To this day I am not exactly sure what all went on but over the next couple of hours Tina was able to recover all my gear and charm the bulk of the people in my guild who, in turn, kept insisting that she should 'roll' up a character.
And so she did. That evolved into a second account and later dual computers.
December 06, 2006
The golden ole days
Things, our way of life, is different now then it was when I was growing up in the 1960's. In talking with the elders in town, life was different in the 1940's then the 60's then now. In other words society evolves.
It used to be when someone moved away old friendships would be maintained by letter. Later an occasional phone call. Now you can have a six way conversation over the internet while you play an online game together. Or even have a blog where your friends and family can do a quick catch up on whatever is going on or any rant you have going.
In my mind maintaining a friendship on an active basis is better then sending letters.
When I was growing up, I could walk down my street and tell you the last name of nearly every family living in the various houses. I cant do that now. The reason why? My mom was a stay at home mom. She would be on her own while the kids are at school day after day. Our house was immaculate (she still can out clean close to anyone on the planet).
My mom, like most of the homemakers of that time. Would get bored and either turn on the soap opera's or go shopping or head outside and garden or go over to others houses and 'visit'.
Visits consisted of small talk and tea or coffee. Sometimes card games etc. The group would consist of various neighbors and the group would grow or wane depending on the day to day goings on.
In this way the neighborhood became a community and families would get together for various outtings because of the friendships these stay-at-home-moms would form.
Today, everyone works. Instead of being at home. Even if you were a stay at home parent you wouldnt likely be able to get together with other peoples because they are working as well.
So we evolved out of the nieghborhood format and a goodly portion of our social activities involved clubs, churches and co-workers. Or we just hang out with our families.
In my mind this isnt a great step in evolution.
It used to be when someone moved away old friendships would be maintained by letter. Later an occasional phone call. Now you can have a six way conversation over the internet while you play an online game together. Or even have a blog where your friends and family can do a quick catch up on whatever is going on or any rant you have going.
In my mind maintaining a friendship on an active basis is better then sending letters.
When I was growing up, I could walk down my street and tell you the last name of nearly every family living in the various houses. I cant do that now. The reason why? My mom was a stay at home mom. She would be on her own while the kids are at school day after day. Our house was immaculate (she still can out clean close to anyone on the planet).
My mom, like most of the homemakers of that time. Would get bored and either turn on the soap opera's or go shopping or head outside and garden or go over to others houses and 'visit'.
Visits consisted of small talk and tea or coffee. Sometimes card games etc. The group would consist of various neighbors and the group would grow or wane depending on the day to day goings on.
In this way the neighborhood became a community and families would get together for various outtings because of the friendships these stay-at-home-moms would form.
Today, everyone works. Instead of being at home. Even if you were a stay at home parent you wouldnt likely be able to get together with other peoples because they are working as well.
So we evolved out of the nieghborhood format and a goodly portion of our social activities involved clubs, churches and co-workers. Or we just hang out with our families.
In my mind this isnt a great step in evolution.
December 05, 2006
Cold is as Cold Does
Cold means quite a different thing to different people from different regions. How many times have you heard someone state they are 'freezing' when you feel the temp. is just fine?
Growing up in OC I remember it dipping down into the 50's and people bundling up. Now in the Pacific North West. 50's is nothing, when it gets to the 40's I feel cold and the 30's I need a jacket and so on as the mercury dips lower and lower.
When it has been in the 30's for a good bit a wam day of 50 degrees allows you to go outside and bask a bit. In the early sprint 60 degrees means shorts and T-shirts.
This isnt a new discovery or anything. Just something I find interesting when I chat with my OC friends. I first noted that where you lived determines cold from Delta Joe. It was a brisk day in Pasadena in the mid 50's and he was in cutoffs and a t-shirt. At that time it was cold to me but not to Joe.
He had come from Alaska.
I have often wondered about someone who transitions from extreme conditions. Like from Edmonton to Atlanta...
Growing up in OC I remember it dipping down into the 50's and people bundling up. Now in the Pacific North West. 50's is nothing, when it gets to the 40's I feel cold and the 30's I need a jacket and so on as the mercury dips lower and lower.
When it has been in the 30's for a good bit a wam day of 50 degrees allows you to go outside and bask a bit. In the early sprint 60 degrees means shorts and T-shirts.
This isnt a new discovery or anything. Just something I find interesting when I chat with my OC friends. I first noted that where you lived determines cold from Delta Joe. It was a brisk day in Pasadena in the mid 50's and he was in cutoffs and a t-shirt. At that time it was cold to me but not to Joe.
He had come from Alaska.
I have often wondered about someone who transitions from extreme conditions. Like from Edmonton to Atlanta...
December 01, 2006
I'm a stupid man
Today is my day off. As such I have to go in for four hours overtime. Then there are various errands to run.
The Van gets better gas mileage then my truck so I figured I would be smart and take that to work. The fact that I have the only keys for the truck or that my wife would be stranded at home never fired a single synapse in my grey matter.
I apologize hon.
The Van gets better gas mileage then my truck so I figured I would be smart and take that to work. The fact that I have the only keys for the truck or that my wife would be stranded at home never fired a single synapse in my grey matter.
I apologize hon.
Heroes
http://www.nbc.com/Heroes/
I like science fiction, likewise science fantasy, sword and sorcery. Movies, Books, Graphic Novels, Television etc. My personal favorite genre is the Comic Book superhero. As a long time comic book fan I have been very dissapointed in the horrible transition my favorite characters have made to other media. Until lately.
Maybe its the name 'comic' that gives people a preconceived notion that these stories are camp or two dimensional in scope. As my peers come of age you see the influence comming through. Wheadon, Kevin Smith, Loeb, Rami and many others have a respect for the media and have been able to provide the comic book style outlet to the mainstream. And it has been embraced.
The latest example is the NBC show Heroes. Each week watching it is like turning the pages of a comic to me. The background main story, the sub-plots the character building.
I even like the multi-media approach of being able to watch it online or do a two min catch up. They have a weekly comic online that helps connect the dots as well.
It's very cool.
Save the Cheerleader, save the world.
I like science fiction, likewise science fantasy, sword and sorcery. Movies, Books, Graphic Novels, Television etc. My personal favorite genre is the Comic Book superhero. As a long time comic book fan I have been very dissapointed in the horrible transition my favorite characters have made to other media. Until lately.
Maybe its the name 'comic' that gives people a preconceived notion that these stories are camp or two dimensional in scope. As my peers come of age you see the influence comming through. Wheadon, Kevin Smith, Loeb, Rami and many others have a respect for the media and have been able to provide the comic book style outlet to the mainstream. And it has been embraced.
The latest example is the NBC show Heroes. Each week watching it is like turning the pages of a comic to me. The background main story, the sub-plots the character building.
I even like the multi-media approach of being able to watch it online or do a two min catch up. They have a weekly comic online that helps connect the dots as well.
It's very cool.
Save the Cheerleader, save the world.
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