When God answers.

I am a Catholic in good standing with the Holy See in Rome.  (full disclosure)

With any faith based belief there are times of crises that makes you ponder said faith.  I would like to share this week's incident.  I asked a question of the almighty and yesterday I saw something that connected a series of dots in my mind that provided an answer that astonished me in its clarity.

It has been a difficult journey.  Last November I had a conflict with a co-worker, this resulted in my being discharged, which resulted in no Unemployment Benefits, which resulted in losing our house and culminated in our plans to move out of country.

The job was one of the most enjoyable ones I had ever had.  I loved going to work, every day.  No longer working there put me into a deep depression and grief.  Fiscally it has taken quite a toll, my family has been a rock of support. However, being a man of faith and prayer, I pondered the meaning, if any.  Earlier this week while on a run (I have become a runner for health and mental reasons).  I was overcome with memories of the incident, loss, guilt, depression, what have you...  I sat on the side of the road and flat out asked God why this happened.  In my best Gideon I required some answer.  I waited, got up and jogged on, telling myself over and over again, that I would know in Gods time, and not quite being convinced.

Tuesday word came down that my attacker had run afoul of the law. In dramatic fashion.


A reported domestic disturbance at a residence in Oakland ended with a police officer firing his weapon and another deploying a taser Monday night.

The Sutherlin Police Department says no one was injured in the incident that took place around 7:15 p.m. at a home on NE Pine Street. Officers were responding to a reported domestic disturbance between an adult male and female. Police say they were informed that children were present in the residence and a firearm was also known to be in the home.

When officers arrived at the home they made contact with a 49-year-old man inside one of the bedrooms. According to Sutherlin Police, the man made statements to the officers indicating he had a handgun. Police say they made several requests for the man to show his hands, but he did not comply and instead attempted to make stealthy movements toward an unknown area beside him.

The Sutherlin Police Officers reacted to his motions with force. Authorities say one officer fired his weapon at the man, but he was not hit. A second officer used his taser to subdue the man and place him in handcuffs.

Sutherlin Police put the man, identified as Marshall Lanier, into protective custody, pending a mental evaluation, after he reportedly made statements of self-harm. The Douglas County Major Crimes Team has been activated to investigate the incident. The involved Sutherlin Police Officers were placed on paid administrative leave, in accordance with Sutherlin Police Department Policy.

This vindicated me in my own mind, and scared me as well.  This is not the actions of a rational person.  The dot that was connected in my mind was a sobering one as well. The last place I worked in California, before moving up to Oregon had suffered a tragic shooting a little over a year after I left.

Was this an answer as to why?  I am pragmatic enough to argue both yes and no.  On the yes side, it became a reason that is acceptable.  On the no side, it was just coincidence.